How to Buy a Dildo – A Beginner’s Guide to Dildo Shopping

So, you’re buying a dildo for the first time or maybe you bought a dildo before and was not satisfied and need more clarity.  Buying a dildo can be confusing, we know.  The first dildo Jay and I had (actually I bought it for him) was ok, but not great.  It was too hard and just didn’t feel realistic enough.  Jay complained that it was too small.  It also didn’t work well with our lube, we kept having to put more and more every few seconds.  It was more a pain than a pleasure, so we ditched it somewhere deep in our cupboard.  So yes, we know how confusing it can be.  You don’t know how to buy a dildo, which one to choose, where to get one, which one best suits your needs and so many more questions.  We’ve had the same issues but with time, practice and mistakes we’ve been able to determine what hot and what’s not.  But before we get into specifics, this post is a general guide for first time dildo buyers.

 

What are Dildos?

When it comes to sexual penetration, nothing beats the real thing.  However, sometimes when the real thing is not available or not enough or you just want to bring a little extra oomph into your sex life, then a dildo might be a suitable product for you.

 

62731-00Dildos are typically designed to look and where possible, feel like a real penis.  And unlike a vibrator, dildos do not have a motorized component.  After all, a real penis does not vibrate either. So you never have to worry about the toy breaking or running out of juice (no pun intended).   Dildos are generally tapered at the top for ease of entry and then streamlined along a cylindrical shaft to look like a penis.  Most dildos come with a testicle-shaped base.  This is essential not only for appearance but also for practicality – the shape of the base prevents the dildo from slipping all the way up your crevice, especially if it’s for anal play.  We’ve heard stories of people getting things dislodged in their nether region and having to go to the E.R. to have it removed.  Don’t worry, this will never happen with the right dildo and with the correct use.

 

What Do You Want to Do With the Dildo?

There are different dildos for different purposes. For example, some dildos are designed to be as realistic as possible, with penis-shaped tips, veins running all over the shaft, and even a pair of balls at the base. Many realistic dildos are molded from adult porn stars. You can even design your own dildo in the shape of your lover’s member if you want with the Clone-A-Willy dildo maker (the best one includes the balls too).  You also want to consider if the dildo is for solo pleasure or whether it is to be used as part of your couple’s play.

 

Dildos for Solo Pleasure

If you’re choosing a dildo for solo pleasure you may want to consider hands-free options that come with a suction cup at the base.  This allows you to fix your dildo to a smooth surface such as the tiles on your bathroom wall.  Once secured in place you can then do your thing without having to use your hands.

 

Dildos for Couples

hoodlum2If the dildo is for couple’s and both parties want in on the action, then there are dildos for that too.  Double-ended dildos were designed with this in mind.  Double-ended dildos are tapered on both ends and they look like two penises stuck on to each other.  For this to work you have to get into a comfortable and practical position and insert each end into one and then the other’s nether area.  One partner will then move the dildo back and forth to stimulate both parties at the same time.  You can also get creative and find different ways to stimulate each other.

 

Anal Dildos

As a gay man, your dildo will no doubt be for anal penetration, so that must be forefront of your mind when choosing your dildo.  Remember that not every kind of dildo should be used back there.  Anal dildos are made from special materials with special safety features for safe backdoor fun.  There are four (4) things to look for in choosing an anal dildo.

 

  1. First of all, the dildo must be flared at the base to prevent it from getting lost inside you.  You definitely want to avoid an embarrassing trip to the E.R.  If this should ever happen though, don’t worry you are not in any real life threatening danger.  It is just going to be very embarrassing.  But many doctors have had to remove stuff lodged up there so you certainly won’t be their first or last patient of this kind.
  2. Secondly, the dildo should also be tapered at the tip.  Your anal muscles don’t always co-operate, so you need to make it easy for them to relax.  Having a tapered dildo will help with this and make your experience a lot more comfortable.
  3. Thirdly, the material that the dildo is made from should be one that is suitable for anal play.  Hygiene should be your number one priority in this regard.  We recommend using silicone – skin-safe, hygienic, boilable, bleachable, hypoallergenic, odourless, tasteless, non-toxic – need we go on? Silicone dildos offer a body-friendly alternative to rubber which can cause allergic reactions in those who are sensitive to latex. So avoid latex. We’ll talk more about materials further down.
  4. Finally, when considering how to buy a dildo, especially an anal dildo you want to ensure that the design of the dildo is smooth without any rough or sharp bits or edges.  The smoother the better to prevent cuts, bruises or pain.

Personal Preferences – Size and Shape

So once you’ve decided what you want to use your dildo for you can then start exploring some personal preferences such as size.  Remember, if this is your first time, we do not recommend going for the bigger ones.  We know you’re adventurous and think you can take it, but trust us, learn to walk before you run. Take it slow and start off small.

 

In terms of anal dildo size, don’t worry too much about getting something that’s too long.  Length is not really the issue you can choose to inserts a few inches at a time until you feel comfortable taking more in.  What you want to really watch out for is girth, that is, the thickness of the dildo.  Make sure the width is right for you. It’s better to start smaller (thinner) and work your way up.  Something that’s too small can still be fun.  It’s not the size that matters it’s what you do with it.  Or as they say. “It’s not the size of the ship but motion in the ocean that counts”.  But too big can be problematic for you.   A dildo that’s too big might very well end up collecting dust under your bed.

 

In terms of shape, you can get anal dildos that look like a penis (our favorite), ones that are neutral (meaning that they don’t look like anything and are just cylindrical in shape), ones that are curved or have ridges on them.  If you want a dildo that you can use for enthusiastic penetration you might be better off choosing one that has no ridges or extreme curves.  A gentle curve that mimics the shape of a penis is always a nice option as the penis is generally shaped to mirror the curve inside your body.

 

Dildo Materials

Anal dildos are available in a variety of materials, each with their own pros and cons. As mentioned earlier silicone dildos are our first choice for hygienic reasons.  However, there are additional benefits to silicone.  Silicone dildos are generally better in quality, they are more flexible and can come in a variety of shapes, sizes, and colors.  Another common material are jelly rubber dildos.  These are inexpensive and can be great beginner toys, as long as you use a condom on your toy for hygiene purposes. Nobody likes smelly jelly.  There are also dildos made of metal and glass, we personally don’t like using either, but that’s just our preference.  We prefer the more realistic feel that silicone or jelly provides.  Have you ever seen or heard of a dick that feels cold, hard and rigid like metal or glass?  Didn’t think so.  But hey, give it a try if you wish.  As we said, it’s not OUR preference, there are no real reasons not to try them.

 

What to Look for When Choosing a Dildo

dildo-guide

 

Where to Buy Dildos

Buying a dildo is a very personal thing.  If you’re making the purchase for the first time you might feel a little stress or even embarrassed about the whole situation.  Going into a sex store is still taboo for many.  The last thing you want is for a friend or worse yet, a family member seeing you coming out of a sex store.  Gosh, I don’t want to know how I would react if my granny bought me coming out of a sex store.  I would be mortified.  Anyhow, fortunately with modern technology, AKA the Internet, you don’t have to worry about that at all.  You can purchase your next sex toy discreetly over the internet.  There are plenty of online shops to choose from.  One of the largest online stores is LoveHoney, Adult Shopping is another huge one.

 


Lovehoneylovehoney is one of the largest retailers of adult sex toys and other sex products. They sell largely over the internet.  They have been in operations for over a decade and are targeting mainly the United Kingdom, Europe, Canada and Australia.  So if you’re in any one of these territories then Lovehoney is the online sex shop for you.

One of the greatest things Jay and I love about Lovehoney is their returns policy.  They allow you to return your product 365 days after the initial purchase – no questions asked.  They don’t even mind if you have used your toy for each of those 365 days.  If it was too big or too small, if you changed your mind or if it simply didn’t do it for you they will honor your return.  It’s that simple.


Adult Shoppingadult-shopping-store is a huge online sex toy store.  Actually, we haven’t found anything like it.  The variety of sex toys, accessories, adult novelty items, condoms, lube, apparel is amazing. They have over 50,000 items on sale on their site.

We love them so much that we’ve partnered with them to be one of their ambassadors. You’d notice our Jaynkay.com logo on the site.  It’s not our store but we work with them to sell their products.  We totally believe in their fast shipping (we’ve actually used it ourselves many times) within a matter of a few business days our products are delivered discreetly.

 


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